Cherie Blair's Diary of the Blair-Brown Coup (Oct 1994)

Submitted by dalcassian on 24 January, 2017 - 6:22 Author: Sean Matgamna

4 October 1994: TONY’S finest hour. I am so proud of him! HE stood up
there and HE told them what decade this is and what party this is too.
A real leader: they just loved this show of the strong hand! They gave
TONY a standing ovation. At five minutes a bit short, I thought. And a
kneeling ovation would have been more appropriate.

I was much praised for my sustained gaze of rapture and adoration
during the ovation and for the discreet but camera-visible way I silently
enunciated ‘magic' after HE finished speaking TONY had suggested I
mouth ‘a-d-o-r-a-b-l-e-' ,but I thought ‘magic' more cool and modern.
My neck got stiff from holding the pose, but it was worth it.

Little, dear diary. did they realise it, all those who admired my performance,
just how much hard work went into it! I spent three whole hours
last night studying a tape of Nancy Reagan with Ron. She is the great mis-
tress of the politician’s adoring wife look. When I got tired of it I joined
TONY working with a mirror in another room rehearsing his visionary
strong leader look.

Next day, 5 October: communication problems: the members of the
Labour Parry are so stupid! As TONY said afterwards, they don't
understand plain English. Yesterday he told them Clause Four was out, but
today they voted in favour of it! Who, I ask myself, do these upstarts think
they are? TONY was beside himself.

News somehow has get out about my Nancy Reagan tape. I saw Clare
Short curling her lip in feminist derision, as if to say she wouldn’t be seen
dead doing it. We’ll see….

6 October: Its sickening, the people one has to mix with in politics.
As conference ended they had a jazz band play the Red Flag. First
mock it, then scrap it as TONY so wittily said to me. Some party leaders
started to dance to it, among them John Prescort and his lady wife. I man-
aged to keep a straight disdainful face, taking my cue from TONY, who
looked magnificently Byronic and superior. How I love that man!
Afterwards HE explained it to me. ‘It wasn’t the Red Rag they were
dancing to, Cherie baby'. I can’t wait for the day I see the back of such
vulgarities. TONY says it won't be long now.

13 November: Wonderful candle-lit dinner party with leading journalists
to co-ordinate the press campaign. There are far more ignorant and
backward people in and around the party than even I would have imagined.
John Prescott rang –- trying to get through for days, he said —wanting to know
if he could borrow my Nancy Reagan tape. I told him to get his own!

1 December: The press is disgraceful! The Guardian, the Independent
and the Mirror — not that I see it! — are reliable, but some of the Tory
papers think there is something wrong with sending your children to a
good school. What hypocrites the Tones are! They preach looking out for
yourself, then condemn people like TONY and me for practicing it. TONY
couldn’t resist a gentle ‘told-you-so' dig at me. If. he said, we had done
what he wanted and put them down for Eton and Roedean. none of this
would have happened. Dear diary, call me a hopeless sentimentalist if
you like, but I prefer to have my children and their 24 hour nanny close
by me.

Margaret Beckett rang to ask if she could borrow my Nancy Reagan
tape. Told her to ask Prescott to lend her his.

24 December: I’ve never been so convinced as 1 am now of how urgent
it is to put TONY where he belongs, in Downing Street. Today. I walked
from Grays Inn to Kingsway: it is full of homeless people! Sleeping and
lying in their bedding in doorways, as Christmas shoppers hurry by. ln
broad daylight! In full view of decent people. What an affront! We really
need a strong law and order government to clear these streets.

Helped TONY prepare to be interviewed by She magazine. Hello will
be next if we play our cards right

Have been drawing up a list of M Ps to send Christmas presents to.
I have had two dozen copies made of my Nancy Reagan tape. Everyone
seems to want one. Barbara Follett wants to set up a course to teach MPs
'the look'

30 January: Had a frustrating day in court prosecuting people who
refuse to pay the Poll Tax. The courts are far too soft these days. I wanted
them jailed. I suspect that one magistrate is a member of the Labour

Clare Short rang and asked if I had a spare copy of my Nancy Reagan
tape. I laughed! I like a woman who can make such a fine pretence of
dignity. I promised to see what I can do

6 February: Martin Jacques, deputy editor of the Independent, rang:
charming, fawning man. TONY says, if we didn't already have a neurotic
dog — the psychologist's fees would astound you. dear diary — we
might consider adopting him. Marty is sending me a video with old film
about political etiquette, tips for TONY

28 February: Have had 50 copies of my Jacques video made. I really like it!
The wonderful balletic precision with which the leader and his entourage
moved together in and out of meetings — the leader a dozen paces
ahead, the deputy behind, then the top ministers so many paces behind
them, then the junior ministers, then the rabble. Magic! Jacques told me
who was who in the film. The handsome moustached chap with the look
of a Visionary Leader is Stalin, who has had a bad press lately; neglected
the PR side of things, it seems. I'll send a copy to Prescott.

17 March: Sent copies of Jacques video to the leading 50 Labour MPs.
More are being made. We are almost there! Paul Johnson, the most saga-
cious living Tory philosopher, is backing TONY. Strangely, TONY is still
despondent, depressed by the sheer number of the idiots who have
dared to oppose him. "What can it mean?", he kept asking last night in
bed. HE fears that unless we do something drastic they will still be around
after the special conference on 29 April — and after the next election.

29 March: At last! We publish the new Clause Four today. Some of our
friends act as if they have been cheated. Clare Short rang to ask what
happened to our promise to mention women and black people. 1
laughed. I like Clare. She has integrity as well as dignity. When I told HIM
later, TONY stopped being Byronic long enough to giggle delightfully.

25 April: Almost conference time again! I've been far too busy lately to
work on my Nancy look. I must practise this evening — "M-A-G-I-C"!