“Yes, of course I’ll top up your Oyster for £2.50, because …

• “You’ve only got £2.50 on you.”
• “You only need £2.50 to make the journey you want to make.”
• “I’m worried you’ll be in danger if you have to leave the station to get a top-up elsewhere.”
• “I’m worried that you will become abusive or violent.”
• “I believe in providing a world-class customer service.”
• “That POM is unreliable/broken/empty/has a long queue.”
• “I’m anticipating that you may have a negative balance on your card.”
• “You look like you’re about to cry.”
• “You seem a decent sort of person.”
• “You’re a child (or you used to be).”
• “It’s a rubbish policy anyway.”

Staff have sold thousands of top-ups of less than a fiver since LUL imposed this job-cutting £5 minimum policy on 2 January. No-one has been disciplined.